The Girl Who Dared to Think Read online

  “Really? So you screw up, and they basically forgive you for screwing up? Must be so nice to be a computer.” I was unable to keep the bitterness out of my voice, even though it wasn’t fair to Jasper that I was so frustrated. I was just so disgusted with the fact that they would spend more time trying to fix a glitched computer than a one or a two. Or their stupid broken system.

  “I don’t have anything to compare the experience to,” Jasper replied. “But yes, I do enjoy being a computer, if that’s what you’re asking me. Humans are so... messy. It’s fun to watch, but I would never want to be a part of it.”

  I blinked, and then shook my head. “I’m not sure how I feel about you calling us messy, but since you’re not exactly wrong, I’ll leave it alone. Just don’t start getting too condescending on me yet.”

  “I will endeavor to remain uncondescending. Your friend is close to waking, so I will leave you now. I hope to see you at your next appointment with Dr. Bordeaux.”

  I opened my mouth to lie, and then decided against it, and nodded. “Goodbye, Jasper.”

  “Goodbye, Squire Castell.”

  Silence filled the room, but it was impossible to tell if he was gone or not. Then again, if he was networked to the computer in this room, was he ever really gone? What was Jasper, really? Was he a new version of Scipio, but on a smaller scale? Was each department getting its own AI? If so, were they linked? Had Scipio heard my conversation as well?

  I pushed the thoughts aside, as they were not productive. There was nothing I could do about Jasper right then, except hope he carried through on his promise to help us, and that he wasn’t networked to Scipio directly. I turned back to Grey, and noticed him moving more, on the cusp of waking up.

  “How are you feeling?” I asked as Grey’s eyelids fluttered open. He looked around the small private room in the Medica’s clinical treatment ward, and groaned.

  “Medica’s... too... bright,” he managed, and I smiled, looking around the white room and agreeing with him. His fingers reached for the dermal patch on his chest, and I hurried to grab his hand, stopping it just short.

  “No touching,” I said gently, pulling it back.

  “Oh, God... leech patch?”

  I gave him a sympathetic look and nodded. His wound had become inflamed and needed to be cleansed, and the leech patch did just that, pulling blood through it and separating out the contaminants of the infection, before returning the clean blood back into his body. The patch itself looked innocuous—like a cotton pad for stemming blood—but it was treated with special medicine designed to draw out infections on one side, and a chemical to neutralize it from causing further infections on the other. The result was a gnarly-looking crystallized formation coming out the other side, stained a dark yellow color, resembling sugar-glass candy, only it was dried. It wasn’t pleasant, and was extremely fragile.

  “Sad to say, but yes, and it hasn’t been too fun to watch.”

  He relaxed back onto the thin bed and tilted his head toward me, his eyes softening. Searching.

  “You saved my life.”

  My heart skipped a beat, and I looked away. “I just did what any decent person would do,” I mumbled.

  “No, Liana,” he said, grabbing my hand, and I jerked my gaze up to meet his warm brown eyes, wary and afraid. I felt vulnerable, like he could see into the heart of me, and I wasn’t sure how comfortable I was with that prospect. “You did something that no one’s ever done for me before. Thank you.”

  I nodded wordlessly, uncertain of what to say. After a moment, I squeezed his strong fingers with mine. “I’m just glad I could,” I admitted honestly. Then... “How could you give me your pills like that?”

  Grey blinked, his brows furrowing. “How do you know I did?”

  “I went to see Roark.”

  “And he let you in?” I nodded, and Grey whistled. “I’m surprised.”

  “Well, once I told him that you had been caught and they wanted me to kill you...”

  Grey nodded, his face sobering. He raised his hand to look at his indicator and lowered it again. “How long do I have?” he asked, and I shrugged.

  “I’m not sure. But we should get out of here as soon as possible. If they figure out our ranks, or how we modified the system to protect you, they will come for us, and I can’t protect either of us here. We should get you to Roark.”

  “You’re right,” he said, sitting up so fast that I winced, my eyes going to the leech patch over his chest, the crystallized pus barely clinging to the other side. I could barely look at it, not wanting to see it crack open, but luckily it held.

  “Lie down,” I ordered, once I realized it was still intact. “If we’re going to move, I have to take this off you.”

  I went over to the wall and pressed on the interactive screen, ordering up a set of gloves. I heard the rasp of Grey lying back down in a rustle of sheets as I began slipping them on. Turning, I saw him watching me, his head cocked.

  “What?”

  “How do you know to do that?” he asked.

  “I take a lot of interdepartmental classes. They’re a great way of escaping my parents’ disappointment in me, of trying to make them see that I was trying...” I trailed off and sighed. “I’m not the biggest fan, but it’s better than the alternative.”

  His face was sympathetic as I crossed back over to him and immediately got to work on the patch. The trick was to lift from the sides and not the corners, and hold it firmly, but not too tightly. I lifted the thing up, tossed it into the waste receptacle, and turned back to the wound, which was still oozing a little but looked much better than before.

  “You’ll need a dermal bond,” I said, pressing gently on the skin just around the wound. The pink goop helped regenerate damaged skin and tissue in a matter of hours, instead of days or weeks. “And no climbing for a few days. Elevators only.”

  Grey’s smile grew, and I looked up to see him watching me intently. “You have really gentle hands,” he commented, and a flutter of nervousness shot through me.

  I gave him an incredulous look and leaned back, pulling the gloves off and tossing them into the receptacle. Ignore it, I told myself, and I did. “I can’t get a dermal bond, so hopefully Roark has some.”

  “Then there is no time to waste.”

  I looked up at him, and was surprised to see him already getting out of bed, a sheet wrapped low around his hips.

  “Don’t worry,” he said when he saw me staring at the draped fabric. “I’m wearing underwear.”

  He winked, and I flushed bright red and turned away. “The screen—patients’ belongings,” I managed, in a weak attempt to tell him where his clothes were. “There.”

  I pointed to the far corner of the room, but didn’t turn to look.

  Luckily he got it, and I heard the sound of fabric sliding on skin. He was getting dressed behind me, and it was uncomfortable. Too much, too soon, too fast. I lacked the courage to even respond to his flirtations, because I was too worried about what I said or did. Then again, maybe I had already used up my courage quotient for the day, what with pulling all of that off in front of the Champion.

  Thinking about the gaunt man with hungry eyes, so eager to kill Grey that he’d been willing to overlook Grey’s raised number, still gave me pause. I was certain that he wasn’t done, and that Grey had caught his attention, which meant both of us needed to be very careful now.

  Using the elevator to get him back to Cogstown was fine, but if I was going to see him and Roark again, I was going to have to utilize the plunge and lashes more often to keep any future meetings between us as private as possible. Especially when they were supplying me with the medication.

  “I’m ready,” he said, and I turned to see him waiting, his chest still exposed under his torn shirt.

  I wrinkled my nose playfully at him and smiled. “You’ll burn those clothes as soon as you’re out of them later, right?”

  “Look at you,” he said dryly. “Already trying to get me out of
my clothes.”

  He winked at me, and I rolled my eyes before offering him some help. “Put your arm over my shoulder and follow my lead,” I told him.

  “Wait—the Medics have released me already? Nobody came in to give me the after-care speech or a condescending lecture about my rank.”

  “I’ll be more than happy to give you a lecture about your rank, if you want one so badly. I’m pretty sure I’ve got the important bits memorized.”

  I had no intention of telling Grey about Jasper, because I still wasn’t sure what to make of the computer. It seemed like Jasper had wanted to keep himself a secret, so I opted to respect that. He had offered us his help, after all.

  “Hard pass. Not because I think you couldn’t do them justice, but because I’ve pretty much memorized them as well.” His arm settled onto my shoulders while my own arms went around his waist.

  Together, we moved out the door and into the mostly deserted hallway, and I began guiding him toward the exit. We had been out of the room for barely ten seconds when a woman with bright red curls gathered in a massive explosion of color around her face walked up to us.

  “And where do you think you two are going?” she asked.

  I put on my best guard face. “I was told he had been released,” I said, scrunching up my face in confusion. “I was ordered to help him back home.”

  “This is the first I’m hearing about it,” she said, slipping a pad from her pocket and presumably pulling up the patient list. I watched her face closely, noticing the little line forming between her eyes.

  “Apparently... I signed these orders,” she said after a moment, her eyes flicking up at us in accusation.

  “Oh. Did you forget?”

  Grey made a sound in his throat, and I realized he was fighting back a laugh. I ignored him and met the woman’s bright green eyes head on, daring her to challenge me on it.

  She arched an eyebrow, her eyes narrowing. “No, I didn’t. Because I didn’t sign these.”

  “Are you sure?” I pressed. I took a step forward, leaving Grey to stand on his own. “I know it can get quite busy here at times.”

  “I’m sure,” she insisted, slipping the pad back into her pocket. “There’s something going on here, and I’m going to find out what.”

  I held up my wrist and yanked down my sleeve, revealing my nine to her. “Are you doubting my word?” I asked, trying to spear her with my gaze. “Are you doubting the rank and honor bestowed upon me by Scipio?” Beside me, Grey made another noise that sounded suspiciously like laughter, and I resisted the urge to turn back and smack him. If he gave us away...

  “I... No!” she exclaimed, suddenly flustered. Her eyes darted around the hall for a second, and she licked her lips.

  “And are you denying signing the orders to release this man? Even though you did it right in front of me?”

  “I... I did?” Now she looked downright confused, and nervous. I decided to ease up then, and rested a gentle and concerned hand on her shoulder.

  “Maybe you need to get looked at,” I said softly. “Or get some rest.”

  “I... well... I have been tired lately,” she said hurriedly. “I guess maybe I... I’m sorry, honored Knight. Please carry on.”

  I inclined my head toward her and began moving Grey to the elevator. The woman followed us for a few steps, but then fell back. A glance behind showed her still watching, though, and I raised my hand and gave her a concerned smile.

  She smiled back and turned to leave, and I exhaled slowly.

  “You’re a good liar,” Grey commented softly, and I pressed my lips together, uncertain whether that was how I wanted to be seen by him.

  Grey must have noticed my discomfort, because he immediately began to backtrack. “Not that I think you’re a bad person—your lies got me out of that horrible place, after all. I mean, not all lies are bad, if you really think about it. There’s lying to make someone you care about feel better, lying to save a life, lying to protect someone, lying to...” He fell silent as we got to the elevator platform. “Does it bother you?” he asked, after a pause.

  “Lying?” I asked, and he nodded. I considered it while the elevator’s voice chided Grey about his number. Then I shook my head. “I’ve lied all the time, Grey—about who I am, what I am, how I want to be, my feelings toward the Tower and Scipio... My entire life is based on that lie, and I’ve hated it. But this time... I did the right thing, and if lying was the only way to do it, then I have no regrets.”

  “None whatsoever?” he asked teasingly.

  I frowned, my mind instantly going to the woman Gerome had gassed. At how I had been too late to react and save her, even though I had desperately wanted to. In retrospect, if I had done that, then it might’ve been me in Grey’s place, with no one able to get me out.

  “How can you joke at a time like this?” I asked it without derision—I was legitimately curious—and he looked at me, surprise radiating from him. I glanced down at my feet as the elevator began to move. “I mean... you were almost dead. I thought you were dead. The Champion was there, and it was so... scary. I mean, how can you even laugh about anything right now?”

  Grey’s face sobered for a second, and he ran a hand down the back of his neck, massaging it. “I mean, I’m alive, Liana. When they dragged me into that cell, all I could think about was that my life was over. That was where and how I was going to die—and then suddenly you were there. Your hand flashing some sloppy Callivax, asking me to play along... And the next thing I know, I’m free. I can’t be upset or sad or worried. Not right now. I’m too happy that I’m still here, y’know?”

  “I’m just glad you’re a good actor,” I muttered. “I was worried you didn’t know Callivax and wouldn’t get it. Or that I’d get caught doing it.”

  Grey shrugged. “I probably would’ve done the same thing anyway, once I realized it wasn’t working. Tried to get away when they transported the dead to the Medica for disposal.”

  “It wouldn’t have worked—Scipio was monitoring your biometrics.”

  “Yeah, I picked up on that.”

  We fell into silence after that, navigating through the tunnels and heading for the most direct route to Cogstown. The silence wasn’t exactly uncomfortable; it was more due to the state of exhaustion Grey was in. He leaned pretty heavily on me, and his feet were dragging.

  “I should’ve made you eat something,” I murmured, trying to keep us both from pitching over.

  “You asking me out to dinner, Squire?” he quipped, and in spite of the ache in my shoulders and legs, I smiled.

  “Do you ever stop flirting?”

  “Not when a pretty girl is escorting me home. Or when she’s just saved my life.”

  “I’m beginning to regret that decision,” I replied, my eyes scanning the area above the archways, studying the symbols there and finding the one for the elevator pointing right. That meant it was close.

  “Ouch,” Grey said dramatically. “What? It’s okay for girls to go out with the guy who rescued them, but for guys it’s not okay?”

  “What?” I asked, coming to a halt in the middle of the hall and giving him an incredulous look. “You cannot, seriously, be asking me out.”

  He grinned. “Suave, huh?”

  “No, more like idiotic. We barely got out of that place, and we were damned lucky we didn’t get caught. I’m glad you’re happy to be alive, but I’ll feel much better when we get to Roark’s, get you some food, and hash out a plan for how to proceed, moving forward.”

  I began to advance again, the elevator within sight now.

  “So... you think I’m stupid?” he asked. “That’s rough. Most girls don’t want to date stupid guys.”

  I made a very loud and annoyed sound, but couldn’t help the smile that crossed my face again. If he were anyone else, it would seem obnoxious, but on him it was charming. Self-deprecating, with a twist of dry humor, but that confident smile. It was admirable, especially considering what he’d had to face.
/>   And a part of me wished I didn’t like it as much as I did. Because things were only going to get more dangerous from here on out, and attachments and attractions could become a liability.

  Roark looked up from where he was pacing, his eyes wary and alarmed. The shadows under his eyes had darkened, and the creases on his brow seemed to have grown deeper, spreading from cracks into canyons. When he saw Grey, however, his eyes widened and relief shone brightly through.

  “Grey,” he breathed.

  “Hey, old man,” Grey said, stepping forward and away from my support.

  Roark wrapped him in a fierce hug, tears springing to his eyes. “You damnable fool,” the old man groused into Grey’s shoulder. “If you ever give away your pills and don’t tell me again, I swear I’ll...!”

  Grey pulled away, grinning. “You can’t scare me today, old man. I’m alive.”

  Roark scowled. “Yeah, well, you’re extremely lucky you are—and you owe a debt to Liana.”

  Grey looked over at me, his eyes steady and calm as they met mine. “I do,” he affirmed. The look caused me to feel uncertain, the heavy, confident weight behind his words making me feel exposed somehow. And for some reason, I didn’t hate it. It caused my heart to skip a whole sequence of heartbeats before breaking into a step-dance rhythm.

  “You’re injured,” Roark grumbled, taking a step away and studying Grey. “And you’re weak. I’m guessing they didn’t feed you, did they?”

  “They said it was a waste of resources,” I replied, and I felt an accompanying burst of anger at the whole thing. “Listen, we need to talk about all this.”

  “In a minute,” Roark replied as he inspected Grey’s wound. “Did you stop by the Medica first?”

  “We had to,” I explained. “Gerome sent us.”

  “What did they do, and did they give him any medication?”

  “Roark, relax,” Grey said, his eyes opening and closing sluggishly. “Just a leech patch.”

  “And Zoponal,” I added. Roark nodded, giving me a grateful look, and I knew he was asking in case he had to give Grey any additional medication, so he wouldn’t give him something that didn’t react well with what was already in his system. “I’m not sure what it is, just heard the Medics say it when they gave it to him. Is he okay?”