A Shade of Doubt Read online

  I sank into a chair. She took a seat next to me. Even if I didn’t feel confident about the state Ben would wake up in, it didn’t mean I had to worry Sofia unduly about it. What would happen would happen, and we’d just have to deal with it. I reached across the table and clasped her hand.

  “Derek, about Mona,” she began.

  “Oh.” In my anxiety over my son, I had completely forgotten about Mona. “What happened?” I leaned forward, staring at Sofia intently. She bit her lip and looked up at me. Uncertainty and worry showed in her eyes. I squeezed her hand. “Tell me.”

  “Two witches from The Sanctuary, Brisalia and Csilla Adrius—sister and niece of the late Odelia Adrius—are here on this island as we speak.”

  There were so many things about that one short statement that sent my mind reeling.

  “What?” I spluttered. “How did they get in here? Why did Mona allow it? Odelia is dead? What do they want?”

  She wet her lower lip, drawing in a sharp breath. “Odelia was murdered. I’m not sure exactly how it happened. Mona said they called her attention outside the island… They claim they want to form an alliance with us. I didn’t have time to discuss any details with her, but—”

  “I want them off this island.”

  “Derek… they said they can help us find Rose.”

  I stared at Sofia, unable to believe that she was even entertaining the idea of cooperating with them.

  “I don’t care what they say,” I growled, scraping my chair back and standing up. I stalked to the door and looked back at Sofia. “Stay here and keep an eye on Ben. I’m going to tell Mona right now—”

  She hurried over to me and gripped my arm, pulling me back. “Wait,” she breathed, her eyes glistening with tears. “I had the same reaction as you when I first saw them. But Derek… how long has it been since Ibrahim and Corrine left? What if… what if something happened to them? They haven’t made contact with us as they promised they would. So much time has passed, with Rose gone. I’m losing hope…” Her voice broke.

  The way she was looking at me made me ache inside. I saw such sorrow in those beautiful eyes of hers. It cut me that there was nothing I could do to alleviate her suffering.

  I held her waist and drew her closer to me, wiping her tears with my thumbs and kissing her cheeks.

  I breathed out as she wrapped her arms around me, burying her head in my chest. I gripped the back of her head and rocked her gently from side to side.

  Despite the burning in me to alleviate Sofia’s suffering, I knew that desperation was clouding her judgment. I was sure that the witches were preying on us at this vulnerable time, knowing that we would be more likely to accept whatever they proposed out of desperation to get our daughter back. But that was insanity. We’d already suffered enough at their hands. I wasn’t about to run even the slightest risk of suffering because of them again.

  We couldn’t approach them from a stance of weakness. From vulnerability. That much I had learnt about these creatures. We had to approach them from a position of strength. We had to be cool in our dealings with them, even if it killed us inside.

  Although it pained me, I clutched Sofia’s shoulders and separated myself from her. Looking her straight in the eye, I said, “We cannot allow these witches to run all over us again. We cannot agree to whatever proposal they have. I can guarantee you without even hearing it that we will be worse off for it. We are desperate to get our daughter back, but taking help from these witches will not make things better.”

  Tears began to stream silently down her cheeks.

  “Sofia, we need them off this island,” I continued.

  I understood how Sofia saw these witches. She saw them as a flicker of hope, however faint it might be.

  Me, I was a pessimist. I always saw darkness before I saw light. And in these witches’ case, I struggled to see any redemptive quality in the manner in which they had approached us.

  They wanted something from us. They had no interest in helping us and they would do all they could to wriggle out of any commitment they might make in regards to our daughter. We’d be risking the safety of our island by forming an alliance with them. I didn’t know exactly what their motivation was, but I knew it wouldn’t be for our benefit.

  “What if they could actually help us find Rose?” Sofia croaked.

  It was clear she wasn’t going to give up on the idea easily. I led her to the sofa and pulled her back against my chest, stroking her hair as I wrapped an arm around her.

  “I can’t say for sure that they don’t know where our daughter is. Perhaps they do. But forming an alliance with them is like forming an alliance with the devil. You know these witches as well as I do.”

  She gulped. “I do, and yet I can’t help but feel I won’t be able to live with myself if I don’t at least try this. We know that not all witches are bad. After all, we are all still here because of witches. I just wonder, since the Ageless we knew has died, perhaps they have developed more humane qualities?”

  I forced myself to consider her words even though my gut reaction was to reject them. The simple fact was, I wasn’t willing to risk the safety of our people or our island.

  I shook my head. “They are of the same blood as the Ageless. You said Odelia was her sister, for Christ’s sake. They are one and the same. I’m as desperate to get Rose back as you are, but we simply cannot let desperation lead us.”

  Sofia paused, biting her lip. I hated to leave her this way. I was denying her this avenue while offering no alternative. But she wasn’t thinking straight. I was in just as much pain as her over Rose’s absence, but we had to find a way to get Rose back without these witches’ help. We had many children on this island for whom we were responsible, not just Rose. We couldn’t be reckless.

  “I need to go to Mona,” I said. “They never should have been allowed on this island to start with, and I don’t want them here a moment longer.”

  Leaving Sofia, I strode back over to the door and left the apartment.

  Chapter 4: Mona

  There was a loud banging at the Sanctuary’s front door. I doubted it would be Kiev. I’d just told him I wanted some time alone. Whoever it was, I assumed it must be important.

  I opened the door to see Derek standing outside. His fists were clenched. I was surprised to see him so soon after Brisalia and Csilla had arrived on the island. With Derek and Sofia’s son turning, I’d thought they’d take at least a full day to come to a decision.

  Just looking at Derek’s face, I already sensed what their decision was.

  “I want those two witches off this island immediately. There’s no need for us to grant them a reception. They need to leave.”

  My mouth went dry as I stared at the vampire.

  “A-All right.”

  “From now on, don’t let anyone from The Sanctuary onto this island. Ignore them.”

  I nodded, although I could barely focus on his words. He turned on his heel and walked away.

  I clutched the door handle, guilt and anxiety welling in the pit of my stomach. Evidently, I was to be the one to tell them the news and then escort them off the island. I closed my eyes, trying to steady my breathing.

  I didn’t know why I was feeling like this. I’d thought I’d be relieved to learn they would be booted off the island. All I felt was anxiety as my mind whirred, trying to imagine how I was going to tell them. How I would word it.

  Derek had made it clear that he didn’t want me to wait around before removing them. And he was right. Yet every fiber of my being fought against it as I vanished myself from The Sanctuary and reappeared outside the wooden cabin I’d left the two witches in.

  I took a deep breath as I clasped the door knob.

  Just do it. Just get it over with.

  I unlocked the door and stepped inside. I crossed the living room and headed to the bedroom. Both Brisalia and Csilla sat upright on the bed, looking unruffled as if they’d only been sitting there five minutes, showing no detectable
signs of impatience. They stood up as both sets of blue eyes settled on me.

  My voice caught in my throat as I tried to speak. I still didn’t know how I was going to say this.

  Brisalia smiled kindly. It killed me how wide her eyes were with expectation. Expectation that I was about to dash.

  “Well, Mona? Have the king and queen granted us a meeting?”

  I shook my head, averting my eyes to the floorboards. I gripped the sides of my dress, trying to keep my hands from trembling.

  “You need to leave, Brisalia,” I managed.

  There was a silence. The most uncomfortable I ever remembered enduring.

  Then Brisalia said, “I understand, Mona. That’s okay.”

  I looked up and stared at her. I was surprised that she should be so easily accepting after the trouble they’d undergone to come here in the first place.

  Brisalia was smiling softly. She caught her daughter’s hand and began heading for the door.

  “I suppose I shouldn’t have expected much different,” she said as she stopped with Csilla outside the front door. “Though I suppose I thought Sofia would give our offer a little more consideration, given that we could help get her daughter back. I suppose our kind really did put them through the wringer before. Perhaps their trust never can be restored.”

  I nodded faintly, then placed my hands on Brisalia’s and Csilla’s shoulders, vanishing us from the spot. We appeared again outside The Shade. We hovered over the waters outside the border of the island. I still couldn’t bear to look them in the eye. I let go of them after I returned their powers and they hovered next to me.

  “I… I’m sorry.” My chest felt constricted, my throat tight. “I told you there were no guarantees… but I suppose I thought they’d at least give you a proper reception.”

  This time it was Csilla who comforted me. She reached out and squeezed my shoulder, assuming the same understanding smile as her mother. “That’s all right. I guess we weren’t expecting a proper reception. Though it would have been nice.”

  I smiled awkwardly. Brisalia leaned toward me. Her perfume filled my nostrils as she drew me in for an embrace. As she pulled away, her lips pressed against my cheek. Csilla embraced me likewise. I felt my face grow hot.

  It both thrilled and disgusted me that they should treat me so warmly. I felt like a monster for not telling them the truth.

  That moment was the closest I’d ever come to finally admitting that it had been me who had killed Brisalia’s sister, Odelia. But somehow, I couldn’t. I just couldn’t. Even though guilt clawed at my chest at allowing them to treat me like a friend when I’d done nothing but cause them harm, I didn’t think I’d be able to handle the disappointment in their faces. Because the truth was, a part of me was a coward. I was still running away from the horrors of my past rather than facing them.

  “Well, goodbye, I suppose,” I said. I gave them both a faint smile and was about to vanish, but just before I did, Brisalia caught my hand and squeezed it.

  “Wait, Mona. Before you go, there’s something I want to give you.”

  She snapped her fingers in the air. She clenched her fists, then opened them to reveal a small box.

  A gasp escaped my lips. My knees suddenly felt weak. I reached out and took the box from her. I ran my fingers around its gem-encrusted edges, relishing every contour of the small box in my hands. It had been my mother’s jewelry box. My father had given it to her as a wedding present. Tears welled in my eyes as I tried to swallow back the childhood memories this box brought about, memories of my beautiful mother.

  “You recognize it?” Csilla asked.

  I bit my lip, nodding. “How could I not?”

  Opening it up, I was yet again surprised to see the small oblong box was still filled with jewelry. It was my mother’s jewelry, still intact.

  I stared at Brisalia, a tear spilling from my eye. “How did you get this?”

  She shrugged, still holding that calm smile.

  “When your family passed on, my servant was put in charge of sifting through their belongings and keeping anything of value. I wasn’t sure that I would ever see you again. I doubted it. But I knew that if I ever did meet you again, Mona, I would give you this.”

  I was speechless. It was all I could do to control my tears. I didn’t know that I could manage to speak without my voice breaking.

  “Thank you,” I breathed.

  “You’re welcome… I suppose we ought to get going now. I fear we’ve already outstayed our welcome.” She paused, reaching out and clutching my hands again. “We know that you’ve left Rhys and are no longer allied with him. I want you to know that if you ever need somewhere to go, or if you want to just visit home, you are always welcome in The Sanctuary.”

  Pain tore through my chest. I wanted to go more than anything, even if just to experience what it was like to feel welcome in my home, to live there without fearing for my life. But I couldn’t. It would forever be a distant dream.

  I nodded. “Thank you. But my home is here in The Shade now.”

  She withdrew her hand, her cool eyes still fixed on mine. “Of course…”

  She looped her arm through Csilla’s and, as she raised a hand to wave goodbye, both of them vanished from the spot.

  I’d been clutching the jewelry box so hard, its gems were beginning to form dents in my skin.

  I vanished myself back inside The Shade and appeared outside Kiev’s and my home. I didn’t bother to check if Kiev was back. Opening the front door, I rushed straight upstairs and locked myself in the bedroom. Sitting at my dressing table in front of the mirror, I stared at the pale, teary-eyed girl looking back at me. I reached out and positioned the box in front of the mirror. Staring at it, I traced it with my fingers once again, as though to memorize every part of it by touch alone. Fumbling for the latch, I flipped it open. An amber ring, two sets of ruby earrings, and a silver-plated amethyst necklace. Closing my eyes, breathing deeply, I could still remember my mother wearing them.

  I picked up the pieces of jewelry one by one and tried them on, with shaking hands, in the mirror. I was about to replace them again for safekeeping when I remembered there was a second level to the box. If I recalled correctly, it had contained a stash of my mother’s pearls. I gripped the small handle at the base of the box and tried to pull it open. But it was fastened tight. With age, I supposed. I’d lost count of how many human years had passed since I’d last seen my mother alive. I didn’t want to force it open in case I damaged the box, so I closed the lid and replaced it on my dressing table.

  I slumped back in my chair, my eyes still fixed on the box. The look of disappointment in Brisalia’s face and the words she’d spoken before we’d parted replayed in my mind. And I felt suddenly disturbed.

  As much as it wasn’t fair, I couldn’t help but feel resentment toward the king and queen of The Shade for dismissing my two old friends so unceremoniously.

  Chapter 5: Csilla

  Once Mona was safely out of view, my mother and I vanished ourselves to a cluster of rocks a few miles away from the boundary of The Shade.

  I had to admit, I’d thought the king and queen would have at least granted us a meeting, considering what we’d said we could offer them. Their kicking us off the island so swiftly hadn’t been expected, but we had of course planned for it. As we walked toward the center of the rocks, my mother didn’t seem too fazed by it.

  “You know, Csilla,” she said, sitting down on a rock and gathering the hem of her dress, “I think this actually might work to our advantage.” Placing her hands on her lap, she licked her lips thoughtfully. “Yes, it would have been helpful if we’d been able to scope out the island for ourselves a bit more… but this way they are much less likely to suspect us. Out of sight, out of mind. We just need to trust in the preparations we made before arriving, and trust that things will go according to plan.”

  “I suppose,” I said, sitting down opposite her. My mother cast her eyes about the rocks surroundi
ng us. They fell on a small pool near her feet. She looked at me and nodded toward it. I stood up and walked over to her. We both leaned over it as she dipped her fingers into its center.

  “Yes,” she muttered, slipping herself off the rock and kneeling down over the pool. “This is deep enough…”

  When she spread out her fingertips, a metallic liquid flowed from them. Heavier than water, it sank to the bottom of the pool and as she filled the pool with more and more, soon it had displaced the water. My mother stopped once it was filled to the top. She ran her fingertips over the surface of the pool and the surface hardened beneath her touch. As I peered over it, it took about three minutes for it to form a mirror. Both my mother and I stared at our reflections.

  My mother smiled as she looked over her handiwork.

  “Now, we wait,” she said.

  “How long do you think it will take?”

  “It all depends on when he deems it safe.”

  I stepped away from the pool, manifesting myself something more comfortable to sit on rather than rocks—a reclining armchair. My mother did the same as she took a seat opposite me, and when it began to rain, she formed a gazebo over us along with an invisibility spell to prevent anybody from noticing us.

  For hours we sat, watching the glassy substance, waiting for any sign of movement. As midnight approached, I began to wonder if something had gone wrong. I kept looking up at my mother. She remained calm throughout, no sign of the slightest bit of anxiety, so that calmed my own nerves. I knew if she suspected something had gone wrong, I would notice it in her countenance.

  She was right to be calm, for as midnight struck, the pool finally stirred. What had previously been a reflection of ourselves was now a different vision coming into focus. Blackness at first, then a sliver of light forming around the lid of the jewelry box. As the lid opened further, a bedroom came into view. Mona and a male vampire lay together on a bed, wrapped in each other’s arms, sleeping.

  My mother’s eyes gleamed as we crouched down closer to what was now our window into The Shade.